I think I’m ready to retire. Oh, don’t let my statement fool you. I’ve been retired from public school teaching for 11 years, but I just couldn’t let the kids go. I’ve continued teaching private music students on every musical instrument since my official retirement. I retired seven years ago from serving churches after 40 years of service, but I still fill in for churches when their musicians need vacations or medical leave. And just recently as I was accompanying my private students for their solo ensemble performances, I found myself not reading the music very well.
Is it time, so to speak, to hang up my treble clef? Or maybe, I’m just tired from my knee replacement surgery and getting around in the snow and ice has taken its toll. I fall asleep in the rocker, and I’m having trouble hearing things (That’s not good for a musician!). In the past, my patience was enormous for anyone needing help; now, I seem to need more time for myself.
Without my friends, I would never have been able to get through this physical problem. My biggest realization is how lonely life is without my husband, Michael. He was my knight in shining armor, my “nothing-is-too-hard-to-get-though-guy,” the love of my life.
God never promised that our lives would be without pain or trouble. He did promise to make straight our paths to His eternal home. He did promise to walk beside us, to carry us, and to shepherd us through His Son, Jesus Christ. All we need do is believe in Him, and all will be possible through Him.
Sometimes, I feel that my faith, the size of a mustard seed, isn’t enough to help rebuild our world, to help my students become Christian adults, and to help congregations praise God for everything He has given us. I keep saying to myself, “Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and all these things will be granted unto you.”
At the end of the day, I thank God for another beautiful day of blessings, and I know that “all things are possible through Him.” Should I fully retire or keep going, doing small random acts of love for everyone in my life? I believe God will help me continue to be His loving child, and that is all that matters. Living one day at a time with His loving grace, tomorrow will be more beautiful than the last!
Anna Hartt
