I’m reaching the point in my life where I have to make a major decision. Is it time to fully retire? I’ve been retired from public-school teaching for almost thirteen years, but I have continued to teach private music lessons since that decision in 2007. I’d like to say I’m confident in my decision-making skills, but for some reason, this decision scares me. What will I do with my time that has been filled with students? They have literally been “the poets of my life.”
It’s not really the actual decision that scares me, but a lack of confidence in making that decision. So, I’ll try to describe what I think confidence is for me. I have been a person of faith my entire life, and I know Christ has always walked beside me. I am positive about what I can do; I try not to let worry overcome me. I am open to learning because I will learn more about myself and my abilities. Becoming a writer has proven that point. I am precious, created by God in my mother’s womb. I am a worthy person, valued, gifted, talented, and purposeful. With God’s help, I can do anything, even fully retiring.
By following my heart and not my limitations, I have been able to accomplish many things for others and myself. My weaknesses have never stopped me. I found my strength in God, even with some physical limitations with my knees. I know when God made me, He did not make junk. Anything I have been good at is a gift from Him; Christ took care of the things I could not do. By His love and grace, I have been forgiven my sins.
Trying to follow God’s plan for me, I have been able, for the most part, to make good decisions as long as I thought God was leading me. God fixed my mistakes when He knew I loved Him. “Be not afraid of sudden fear, neither of the desolation of the wicked, when it cometh. For the Lord shall be thy confidence, and shall keep thy foot from being taken.” (Proverbs 3:25-26)
A confident person can do anything they want to do for their future because God will help them. Positive things happen to those who have positive attitudes. Confidence springs from trusting in God, knowing that He has all the answers to our questions. God is the leader of all who place their trust in Him and who believe that their own unique gifts, talents, and knowledge are bestowed on them by Him.
As with all of my decisions, past and future, I place my life into God’s hands. I pray He will eliminate my fear of the future and fill me with abundant joy. With His love, I can walk through any door courageously, knowing He is leading me on the paths He created for me at my birth. I will discover new dreams and cultivate new relationships. I will continue to serve Him through music wherever I am needed. Looking to my future, with His help, I will know an abundant life of courage, confidence, and joy.
Anna Hartt
